Thursday, April 18, 2013

Are Godparents Necessary?

My Godmothers, May 2008 Hampton University. When I graduated college.

I have a confession; I do not have many friends. I know shocking right? How could this cool, try to be trendy, funny mom of twin girls and wife to be not have any girlfriends? To make the long story as short as possible, I trust too easily and I pick the wrong friends. No I do not have girls night out because I do not have any girlfriends and although I am part of an amazing sorority, it is my shyness and my cautiousness that keeps me away of getting too close. Another reason? The friends I do have, we do not have much in common; I am a mom and they are not, which gives them reason to not invite me anywhere but I digress. I just pray that my girls take after their father on this one; a social butterfly.

I have been putting off the girls christening for that simple reason, who would I choose to be their Godmother? I do not have any friends that I would trust with my girls and I don't think any are mentally ready or mature to carry on the role if my fiance and I should pass. I started to wonder if Godparents were even necessary in order for my children to be christened.

I have two Godmothers, my mother's best friend and their husbands automatically became my Godfathers. The difference between my mother and I is that she has best friends. I do not have a best friend. There isn't one person in the world that I can call my best friend. I am so glad my daughters are twins, best friends for life!

The time is coming that I need to get them right with God but I am at the dilemma of who would I trust? I would love for my Godmothers or my mother to be their Godparents, but let's face it, we are looking for someone who isn't going to kick the bucket anytime soon. There is also my cousin who I think would be a good Godmother and there is also my soon to be sister in law and soon to be brother in law that are mature enough to handle the girls I think.

Maybe, the title of the blog should be if Godparents are necessary to have your children christened? I know, too long of a title but there are two questions in one. Godparents role is to be that guardian if something should happen to the parents. They are granted this right during the christening. Is it still a christening if I do not have anyone to take care of my children if something should happened? What would happen if I have not granted anyone this position?

Then, there is the question if Godparents are necessary in general. My father told me recently that I have another Godfather, one I haven't seen since I was 5 months old. Almost a year ago, at my aunt's funeral, I saw him. Godparents are suppose to be a part of the child's life. My Godparents are excellent! They helped me out of financial binds, they attend almost every event. They are the greatest. These qualities are what I want in my children's Godparents, but it is hard when you do not have many choices.

Why is this important? I am a firm believer in Jesus Christ. If something should happen, I want to make sure they will see the pearly gates.

What are your thoughts? Do you have Godparents? Are Godparents necessary?

Monday, April 8, 2013

What is On Your Bucket List?

I remember reading a Facebook post from BabyCenter in which a blogger asked if parent's had a parent bucket list, things they wanted to accomplish for their little ones. I thought to myself; I do not even have a bucket list for myself. I tend to have this attitude that I will live forever, live in the moment. With the recent deaths of Shain Gandee from MTV reality show Buckwild, Jonylah Watkins, the 6 month old baby who was shot and killed on impact, I realize, nothing is promised tomorrow today.

I begin to think what is that I want to do with my life? What do I want for my children, my family? If you know me, and some of you do, then you know that I am the definition of indecisiveness; I can go through five ideas in one minute. Career wise, I wanted to be a journalist (I received my degree in journalism), then a veterinarian, then an author, then a counselor. I always want to do everything, but never accomplish it. I decided to write down my bucket list and a bucket list for my children. This is for me to share but also I find clarity when I write everything down. This isn't in any particular order.

Jamila's Bucket List

  1. Get Married: June 14, 2013 is the date
  2. Project Bump, Inc.: My nonprofit organization that I need to get the ball rolling. I will use my day off to accomplish as much as possible on this.
  3. Go to Paris
  4. Find a career I love: I have become quite passionate in accounting and bookkeeping. I am in the process of completing a certificate in bookkeeping.
  5. Financial Stability
  6. Move down south: Hampton Roads area
  7. Buy a house
  8. Make new friends
  9. More involved in my sorority
  10. Take a vacation with my soon to be husband
  11. Work for myself: Doing bookkeeping and non profit owner
  12. Have another venture
  13. Accomplish everything on my list before I kick the bucket

Mya and Milani Bucket List

  1. Get them into Gymnastics or Dance
  2. Play an instrument
  3. New Daycare
  4. Learn a language
  5. Modeling careers
  6. Good college
  7. Full scholarship
  8. More space for them to run around
  9. travel places
  10. career that makes money
What is on your bucket list?